August 2006

Part 1

Once upon a time there was a Conspiracy Theory Zealot who was obsessed with suspicions and paranoia. Fred believed every whacko theory he read that explained “what really happened” about every major tragedy and triumph in civilization for the last 1000 years. His co-workers called him, “Chicken Little” because every new media headline was another reason to speak about doom at the hands of the global conspirators. His fellow workers would listen to him for two or three sentences and then taunt, “The sky is falling, the sky is falling!”

Fred was anti-government and anti-tax and was convinced that newspapers and TV news were controlled by the powers that be.  He had spent time researching the conspiracy theories of the Marxists, the Nazis, John Birch Society, the Lyndon Larouchies, the Black Muslims, Spotlight Magazine, and many, many other individualized speculations. He knew all about the various players in these various conspiracy theories: The Knights Templar, the Sufis, the Freemasons, the Popes, the Illuminati, the Marxists, Order of the Skull & Bones, the Nazis, The Rothschilds, the Federal Reserve System, Council on Foreign Relations, Trilateral Commission, Order of the Skull & Bones, J. P. Morgan, The Rockefellers, the Round Table Groups, Bilderbergers, Bohemian Grove, and The Bush family.

Fred had his own theories for the betrayal of the Knights Templar, the American Revolution, the French Revolution, the murder of Captain Morgan, Lincoln’s assassination, Garfield’s assassination, McKinley’s assassination, Kennedy’s assassination, blowing up the battleship Maine, the burning of the Reichstag, the attack on Pearl Harbor, Watergate, the murders of Malcolm X, Martin Luther King, & Robert Kennedy, the Vatican banking scandal, the murder of Pope John Paul I, the murder of Princess Diana, the murder of JFK junior, Ruby Ridge, Waco, Oklahoma City, and 9-11.

As whacko as Fred was, even he didn’t want to be distracted by foolishness about space aliens and big foot. And he didn’t appreciate the hatred of racists and people who blamed the Jews for everything. Fred was very uncomfortable with some of those he inadvertently rubbed shoulders with… neo-nazis, the anti-Semitic, violent militias, extreme tax protestors, racists.

Part 2

But Fred was a mess. His obsession with conspiracy theories brought him continual anguish. He had no peace. As a building contractor he had been brought to near bankruptcy more than once by the back stabbing of what he called the “brotherhood”. His attempts to earn a living was a continual struggle, he was convinced, because of the “good ol’ boy network”. Every daily newspaper headline was frustrating to him. The latest stories about the latest media hype was only pablum for the masses. The news events that the establishment media focused on were designed to distract from the real issues. The analysis of the establishment media was so obviously bogus. It burned Fred how the super-rich manipulated the masses and used them as “serfs on their plantation”.